Good-bye to all that
Yesterday I turned in my key to the English department’s office for graduate students. Lately we’ve had to do that whenever the semester’s over, even if we happen to be teaching in the subsequent term. This time is different for me, though: effective today, I’m no longer a graduate student.
I’ve chosen to leave the PhD program without my degree. The life of the academic no longer seems appealing to me. This decision might seem sudden or even rash, but I don’t think it’s either of those things. For a while I’ve been realizing that I’m not happy doing the more isolated tasks associated with professional academia. I prefer the collaborative environment of a well-run class to the general isolation of trying to write something “innovative” about literature. Academic life feels too strongly to emphasize the latter at the expense of the former—or at least too strongly for me.
This was a difficult decision: I still love writing, reading, thinking, and teaching, all attributes for any decent scholar. I doubt there are many other places where wanting to talk about Piers Plowman or Wulf and Eadwacer wouldn’t be greeted with a few raised eyebrows. But feeling happy and fulfilled are more important to me than such “creature comforts,” and I doubt I’d be happy continuing along the academic path.
Over the next while I’ll be figuring out what’s next; I’ll also be writing more at what I’ll be calling “Textivism.” I’m (at least temporarily) clearing out the “Drasty Speche” archive, including course syllabi and other projects, so if there’s something you’re hoping to save, do it before Monday.
To my students & friends at Loyola: Thanks for a great time; I hope to see you all again, sometime soon.